Kat Atwell is a freelance writer, blogger & stage presence telling stories that deliver laughs, validation & community.

Mental Health | Wellness & Self Image | Experiential & Reviews

Moderated —

And it feels so good…

For the next two debates (presuming Trump doesn’t bail because FEELINGS), I recommend the following alternatives for moderators. I tried to make them as unbiased as possible, but let’s be reasonable — that’s a tough job. Without further ado:

Marge from Monsters, Inc. She has zero tolerance for anyone.

The Dude. Because he’ll likely talk more than the candidates and get all existential, which is fine by me.

Go over the two-minute limit with Ice-T staring you down. Go ahead.

Sam the Eagle. Because America.

Danny Trejo. Because, again, America.

A howler monkey.

This is a no-brainer. All hail perfection.

But will I gain weight?

If you’re happy and you know it…