Kat Atwell is a freelance writer, blogger & stage presence telling stories that deliver laughs, validation & community.

Mental Health | Wellness & Self Image | Experiential & Reviews

Simma.

Do you remember the character Cheri Oteri did on SNL with the humongous red beehive hair-do who worked at some kind of mart? Her catchphrase was "SIMMA DOWN NAH!" I specifically remember one where she said that while pretending to shift gears. God, I love funny people.

This is what my brain just did:

I love funny women. Well, I mean, I shouldn't have to qualify by gender. I love all women. I love all people, too. I'm being way too ridiculous.

I'm angry today. I don't like it when people are passively aggressive. Going back to the above internal dialogue, honestly, I don't particularly like people who are solely passive or solely aggressive, either.

I like people who communicate with a sense of empathy. I prefer people to be direct, and sensitive, if need be. I like people to be on the same page, and feel like they're working as a team. I want positive work and effort to be recognized and appreciated. I want to learn from my mistakes, and have other people learn from their own.

Today, though, what I want most is for people to give up being so prideful and stubborn and learn to ask for help and admit when they've done something wrong. Jesus Christ! I created a visual metaphor for some friends today of someone we all know who is going through some tough times. These tough times are manifesting very poorly, and I'm disappointed in his inability to do pretty much any of the above. There's a scene in Monty Python and The Holy Grail - AH! The Black Knight. It's the scene with him. He's lost three limbs, yet he's still hopping around and attempting to be a warrior.

"It's just a flesh wound!"

That's what this guy is doing. To make my metaphor even more grandiose, he has a bunch of really talented people, all wielding a wide variety of weapons, wanting to help him. But no, he's telling them what they've done wrong up to this point, and insisting he has it under control and can fight the beast. Or whatever. And he's not being really tactful about it.

I have managed to water this down to next to nothing, given how absolutely furious I was earlier today. I've been telling myself that allowing anger to fester is an exercise in futility, and that it's not my problem, but I've been mistreated and it pisses me off. It's very awkward, trying to learn how to be angry, when all I've done for the vast majority of my life is qualify it as "venting," and then smother it with the big blanket of Life Goes On.

A lot of my feelings I've had have gone disregarded by me. And, this is where I'm supposed to give myself some credit for seeing it and being grateful, instead of the snap judgment which is telling me it's about damn time.

Now I just need to figure out what to do with all this irritation, because letting it churn isn't solving any problems. Writing was a good start.

Next up: Pancakes for dinner.

Big day, small post.

Anxie-teeeeeriffic.