Kat Atwell is a freelance writer, blogger & stage presence telling stories that deliver laughs, validation & community.

Mental Health | Wellness & Self Image | Experiential & Reviews


I just logged onto the computer for the first time to actually read things, instead of posting pictures, and I was drawn to a link on one of my favorite sites, Tiny Buddha. The link took me to a quiz. In case you're interested, you can find it here.

The results came directly from the quiz. I really like what it had to tell me:

1. Practice self-compassion.
When you start feeling bad about your choices, think of what you’d say to your closest friend if they had your same experiences. Odds are, you’d recognize they did their best based on where they’d been and what they’d experienced.

You wouldn’t yell at them, demean them, or fixate on what they could have done better. You’d do your best to help them feel better right now, because you’d know they’ve hurt enough and they don’t deserve to hurt anymore. You don’t either.

It may also help to visualize yourself as a child. Imagine him or her sitting alone in a room, crying over a mistake, and then look right into that innocent face as s/he says, “Please don’t get mad at me. I tried my best, and I just want you to love me.”

2. Reframe your past choices to identify positive things that came from them.

If you’re convinced that nothing good has come from your choices, you will inevitably see your past through a negative, defeatist lens.

Look back at every choice you’ve regretted, ask yourself, “What good came from this?” This may seem like lying to yourself, as if you’re pretending that something was somehow not painful or difficult.

It’s not. It’s choosing to find something good in the path you’ve taken. If your actions led to a break up, did that allow you time to deal with issues that you may otherwise never have addressed? If your choices caused you to lose a job, did that open you up to other opportunities that may have been better aligned with your passions?

3. Focus on lessons learned and how they’ll serve you well in the future.

You can’t go back and change what you did before, but you can be proud of what you do with the lessons that came from it.

When you start dwelling on choices you wish you made or didn’t make, ask yourself: What did this experience teach me that will help me going forward? What insights did I gain about myself that will help me be the person I want to be?

When you focus on lessons learned, you turn a past you might otherwise regret into something ultimately useful for both your present and your future.

Things show up at weird times for the right reasons.

I saw a beautiful, incredible show tonight at Red Rocks. I'd never actually seen a show there before, despite one previous attempt. At one moment, I paused and just sent out a whole lot of love to the world for allowing me such an amazing experience. Everyone should be able to have that millisecond in time where the beauty that surrounds you just takes your breath away.

Thanks to Of Monsters and Men for making my night magical. And thank you to the couple in front of me who reminded me what affection and adoration look like. I might have made some snarky remarks, but at the end of the night, in reflection, I think it was exactly what I needed to experience.

Fading fast.